Where do you go to meet an ideal mate? This question is rhetorical but if I solicited answers from young, successful singles, I’m willing to bet my monthly liquor allowance that not one would say at the club. Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Or maybe it is. I do not believe that the club is a prime location to meet an “ideal” mate, but I think the club unjustly has a bad rep in the dating world among uppity urbanites.
I’ve had this conversation with friends and associates many times before but just decided to write about it when a saw a comment from Hosea Chanchez (Malik from the hit BET series The Game) in his recent Vibe Magazine interview. When the interviewer asked Hosea where he is most likely to meet a woman he said at the airport. Hosea noticed that the interview was somewhat shocked by his answer and decided to explain saying:
Yeah, why do you sound so shocked? I wouldn’t meet her at a club. If you are probably in the club you probably aren’t the chick for me.
Oh, ok. I want to believe that if given more time to elaborate, Hosea would say that he is not interested in women that spend all of their free time and disposable income partying. And that’s definitely understandable and respectable. But, what I find a bit troubling is that I’ve heard plenty of others, male and female, echo the same sentiment with no such elaboration. It’s usually just cut and dry “if I meet you in the club, I can’t take you seriously”.
Are all clubs Sodom & Gomorrah? Do only bad people go to the club? If you meet someone in the club and you can’t take them seriously because you met them in said club, should they also not take you seriously because you too, on this one particular night which may or may not have been one of many OR a rare occasion were also in said aforementioned club?
AND, I know some people that leave the club on Saturday in just enough time to make it to church on Sunday, where do they fall into this whole debate???
I’m kinda playing devils advocate here because my “club” days are long gone but yall know how I feel about generalizations and this is just one I would like to debunk. And please, cut the BS with the “I don’t go to clubs, I go to bar, lounges, hang-outs & chill spots” because they’re all a slightly more mature and sophisticated version of the same animal. A rose by any other name…
I can go on but I will stop here with this: don’t block your blessings being hung up on generalizations. Get to know the would-be suitor eyeing you from the end of the bar the same way you would the one eyeing you from the end of the pew before you judge him/her.
I’ve had this conversation with friends and associates many times before but just decided to write about it when a saw a comment from Hosea Chanchez (Malik from the hit BET series The Game) in his recent Vibe Magazine interview. When the interviewer asked Hosea where he is most likely to meet a woman he said at the airport. Hosea noticed that the interview was somewhat shocked by his answer and decided to explain saying:
Yeah, why do you sound so shocked? I wouldn’t meet her at a club. If you are probably in the club you probably aren’t the chick for me.
Oh, ok. I want to believe that if given more time to elaborate, Hosea would say that he is not interested in women that spend all of their free time and disposable income partying. And that’s definitely understandable and respectable. But, what I find a bit troubling is that I’ve heard plenty of others, male and female, echo the same sentiment with no such elaboration. It’s usually just cut and dry “if I meet you in the club, I can’t take you seriously”.
Are all clubs Sodom & Gomorrah? Do only bad people go to the club? If you meet someone in the club and you can’t take them seriously because you met them in said club, should they also not take you seriously because you too, on this one particular night which may or may not have been one of many OR a rare occasion were also in said aforementioned club?
AND, I know some people that leave the club on Saturday in just enough time to make it to church on Sunday, where do they fall into this whole debate???
I’m kinda playing devils advocate here because my “club” days are long gone but yall know how I feel about generalizations and this is just one I would like to debunk. And please, cut the BS with the “I don’t go to clubs, I go to bar, lounges, hang-outs & chill spots” because they’re all a slightly more mature and sophisticated version of the same animal. A rose by any other name…
I can go on but I will stop here with this: don’t block your blessings being hung up on generalizations. Get to know the would-be suitor eyeing you from the end of the bar the same way you would the one eyeing you from the end of the pew before you judge him/her.
